Through the new tools that allow the human brain to be studied we now know that play, the spontaneous, pleasurable, non-judgmental exploration of life solo or in company, allows for brain growth at every age.
Encore Viewing of Stepping out of Chaos, Surviving Divorce - Webinar
The Art of Letting Go with Traditional Chinese Medicine
We all have things in our past that we wish we could change. The concept of "going back in time" is something that most of us wish was a reality. Life unfolds in ways that we sometimes don't understand, but it's not without purpose. Envy and anger, pain and fear, regret and defeat; These are all feelings we have dealt with throughout our lives.
Outdoor Activities, Immune Resilience with Acupuncture
Time-In, Practices for Creating an Awesome Life! Part 4
Reflective time or Time-In one of the seven vital wellness practices necessary to harness your brain to support you in designing and implementing an awesome life. Time-In is the practice of setting aside a period of each day, be it a minute, ten minutes, or throughout the day, for conscious and focused mindfulness. Mindfulness is the awareness of what is happening within you without attachment or judgement. There are sensations, thoughts, feelings, memories that arise, all of which you observe rather than actively engage with. Unlike other times where you follow thoughts, come to conclusions, choose an avenue of action, etc., during Time-In you observe what arises in your body and mind without following, fantasizing, or fixing. Out of the seven practices for creating a post-divorce life you'll love, Time-In is a cornerstone. Let's look at why Time-In is so critical for creating a rewarding next chapter of your life and a few ways of practicing it.
For the majority of us there are a rather small number of repetitive thoughts that circle round and round in our minds day in and day out. Without being aware of it, each of us weaves what we experience as "reality" through these few thoughts, the feelings that arise out of them, and the actions that we choose as a result of them. If we do not change how we think about the experiences we have we will feel the same way each time a similar situation comes up and take similar actions. The end effect of living this way is that we recreate the same or very similar scenarios over and over again without realizing our part in creating life showing up as it does. Without awareness it appears that the cause of our experience is "out there" rather than something we have a role in generating.
Time-In is the time you give yourself on a daily basis to intentionally focus your attention on the inner world of your mental, subjective experience.
Time-in is consistently providing yourself an opportunity every day to at first, simply observe the "inner dialogue" that goes on in your mind. This "inner dialogue" is the conversation you have with yourself about life in general, about who you are and what you are and aren't capable of, about the people you interact with, and the meaning and significance you give to your daily experiences. No one hears your inner dialogue but you. Once you become aware of this internal dialogue you begin to have the capacity to assess which parts of it are truly serving you as you create your world and which parts are constantly recreating a life with all too familiar pain and suffering. Practicing Time-In eventually gives you the opportunity to change your internal dialogue and in doing so, change your experience of life. How you respond to phenomena impacts what happens next and draws out different aspects of situations and the individuals with whom you are interacting.
I question if there has there been a time when our attention has been more drawn to the outer world. With smart phones we have a consistent barrage of notifications, communications, and information and with it all, infinite opportunities to externalize our attention. Without time dedicated to exercising our ability to gaze within the mindfulness circuits in our brains atrophy and we become progressively out of touch with who we are, what is deeply important to us, and how we impact our daily experiences. Keeping these inner focused circuits healthy is necessary for the development of wisdom, insight, and empathy. It is not enough to "know" information. Information is a random set of data bits which we can call upon for intelligent sounding conversation yet it is only with the ability to sort that information using logic, insight, and empathy that we are able to integrate it into how we live our lives in a way that improves our experience of being alive.
Without Time-In we sound "smart" and live "dumb".
One time tested way to practice Time-In is through a meditative practice of some sort. Meditation allows for the development of presence. Presence is the ability to be present with what is happening in the moment, let go of judgement, and focus instead on accepting life as it is rather than how we expect it to be. It is only when you know where you are that you can effectively navigate to where you want to go next. Presence allows you to discover where you are, what baggage you are carrying that is no longer serving you, and what you want to take with you as you create a new life.
Not only does a practice of mindfulness allow you to assess the efficacy of your reactions and responses to phenomena, it also "increases the level of telomerase, an enzyme in your body that maintains and repairs the life-preserving ends of your chromosomes. Building up your levels of telomerase supports you in being healthy and therefore living longer. When you focus your minds' attention inwardly you actually change the molecules in your body. You physiologically increase your well-being as well as develop the capacity to weave your life consciously and intentionally.
Time-In empowers you to approach rather than withdraw from challenging situations. Time-In allows you to feel greater meaning in and fulfillment from life. Meaning and fulfillment provides a sense of satisfaction with being alive. Think of a time in your life that was difficult. When you saw yourself as a victim of your circumstances how satisfied were you? Once you began to view the situation from the perspective of "What lessons are here for me to learn?" and "What opportunities are opening up in my life, whether I wanted them or not?" what happened to your suffering? While you may not have been happy about your situation it began to take on a new meaning, and through that new meaning opened up possibilities you continue to explore. Were you more satisfied with life as a victim or as an individual with an open albeit unknown and therefore insecure and understandably frightening road ahead?
For relationships Time-In and the mindful awareness it creates helps you to hear others from their perspectives with compassion and understanding. While their perspectives may not be yours you will be able to hear them, acknowledge them, and have empathy for them. When someone feels seen it smooths their edge, regardless if you "agree" with them or not. When you truly see someone from their perspective and are able to validate that they feel the way they do you open the possibility that that person may be able to "see" your perspective.
When you see each other's perspectives win-win outcomes become much more likely. No one needs to resist or argue in order to feel "heard" or be to "right".
The other today I came home to a sink and kitchen counter cluttered with dirty dishes. I was immediately aware and therefore mindful of anger and resentment arising within me. I asked myself where following anger and resentment would take me. The answer, to a reflection of anger and resentment from the individual who left the dirty dishes and to conflict. I reminded myself this this was not an everyday occurrence, that both of us had returned from a month away the day prior, and that the person in question had made me oatmeal that morning. I realized that I held some responsibility for those dishes as well as the pot of unfinished oatmeal. As I reached to turn on the radio to distract myself from the task ahead I became mindful of wanting my attention to remain focused rather than having my intellect stimulated by intelligent conversation or lovely music while my body was engaged with hot soapy water. I wanted to "be with the cleaning", not because it was right but because I wanted to be singularly focused and peaceful. The kitchen was clear and clean within 10 minutes max. I was peaceful.
Time-In can be a classic practice of sitting meditation using the breath or a mantra or an awareness of what you are thinking, feeling, and doing at any moment. Time-In is focused, conscious. and intentional. That's how you know if it is Time-In or not. Being aware of who you are being, what you are thinking, and creating that space between the thought and the thinker will allow you to create a wonderful life consciously and intentionally.
Post written by Lisa Brick
Founder at Power & Purpose Coaching
Partner: Journey Beyond Divorce Coaching
Learn how meditation is wonderful for kids:
Infertility in Men - Updated post
Infertility in Men
How Acupuncture and Chinese Medicine supports Male Fertility
Female and male.. Egg and Sperm. Yin and Yang
These are the essential balancing polarities that create conception, pregnancy and childbirth. The science of reproduction is well known. Here at the Acupuncture Center of New Jersey in Morristown we treat many women who are referred to us by numerous infertility clinics in our area. Many of these women have been unsuccessful in their attempts to conveive with IVF or IUI so they turn to acupuncture for fertility support. We all know it takes two to conceive. The focus on female infertility is therefore of limited value because up to 40% of infertility actually has to do with the male. Most often I see the female initially and perform an intake and exam on a female patient to determine if acupuncture and Chinese herbs will strengthen and support her fertility. This is treating the Yin or female aspect. Then I ask important questions regarding her male partner’s fertility status. This is to determine the Yang or male energy.
It just takes one in 10 million!
Modern fertility medicine describes male or Yang energy this way: Male Sperm There are three parts to the sperm: the head, tail, and body. Each part is crucial for conception. When analyzing sperm 3 factors are considered:
1. Sperm motility: This measures the percentage of sperm moving in a forward direction. It is considered normal when at least 40% of the sperm are moving in this way. Sperm are also given a grade to show the quality of movement. Grade 1: Immobile Grade 2: Non-progressive and not moving forward Grade 3: Moving slowly in a curved path Grade 4: Swimming strongly in a straight line.
2. Sperm volume: This measures the amount of sperm. The more the better, however, approximately 20 million sperm is an optimal sperm count.
3. Sperm morphology: This measures the size and shape of the sperm. It is quite common to have a high number of abnormal sperm. A normal morphology range is 15% or higher in normal sperm.
Causes for male fertility factors include structural blockages, environmental factors, hormonal imbalance, and lifestyle. This is described in acupuncture terms as weak energy or qi and deficiency in the organs (Kidney, Liver) responsible for creating Yang and Jing, the essence of male sperm. Through questioning, pulse and tongue diagnosis and other means, I can help find the imbalance or blockage that is causing the male infertility issues.
I love helping couples conceive, whether via natural means, or in conjunction with IVF or IUI. I often counsel women to understand that the cause of their infertility is not necessarily their sole responsibility. his helps ease tremendous stress and anxiety that can hinder conception and pregnancy. I treat many male partners with acupuncture and Chinese herbal medicine to support their fertility. I administer acupuncture and herbs to men in conjunction with treating the female in order to treat the underlying factors which may be affecting the sperm production and strength. It takes 100 days for new sperm to be generated. During the course of this time, acupuncture and herbs may be administered to treat the underlying factors which will lead to a healthier sperm status and naturally help support fertility.
Post by Punita Jhangiani, L.Ac., FABORM, Email Punita
Acupuncture Fertility Specialist;
Call for an appointment: 973-984-2800
Tags: sperm motility, male fertility, immobile sperm, acupuncture for infertility, sperm analysis, new sperm, herbs, support fertility,
If you’re a woman you need to read this…
Image by http://nataliebehring.com
To some I looked like the picture of health. But truth is, my minimal food intake was creating a HUGE problem for my body. One of the biggest challenges I faced was food. What to eat, how much to eat, and understanding why it's important to make the right choices each and every day. One day I woke up and noticed my periods were getting lighter, until eventually they stopped all together. There was no severe hormonal issue, no pregnancy, and no thyroid issue, what it came down to was my lack of food intake...mainly healthy carbohydrates. I was malnourished and my body had essentially shut down the part that would allow me to get pregnant. Our bodies are so smart! If you can't nourish your own body well, then there's no way it will allow you to nourish another life. So what needed to change? • EAT MORE CARBOHYDRATES. Eating ketogenic (under 30-50g carbohydrates a day) is not supportive enough for our lady hormones. We need up to 150g per day! Yes your favorite celebrity might be doing the paleo diet and looks slim and healthy, but guaranteed she has hormonal issues too. • EAT MORE CALORIES. 2000-2200 is ideal for most women. You have to stop the calorie counting! Eat a balanced diet and forget about the exact number. Here's a simple breakfast you can eat that will give you all the energy protein sugars carbs and fats you need to start your day. I love it and it really does keep you energized!
-7 raw almonds -7 raw cashews -7 raw walnuts -7 raw pecans -1 tablespoon pumpkin seeds -2 figs or dates. Combine in a baggie, add a piece of fruit to go with the mix, (apples are best) and you are set!
• STOP OVER EXERCISING. Sure your pants may be nice and loose and you may be sporting some rock hard abs from your 2 hour a day workouts, but if you're in your child bearing years, your exercise routine should be more about moderation and less about chiseling those muscles. A brisk walk with some light weight training is ideal.
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• CUT DOWN ON THE MENTAL STRESS. And do something to help de stress yourself. One of the best things you can do is acupuncture. Doing this once a week will help your body remain in balance. If your body is stressed it WILL NOT allow you to reproduce! This is a crucial aspect that needs to be addressed.
By doing these changes, I brought my cycle back into working order, and I feel better than I’ve felt in a long time. I've seen so many young girls who are going through IVF because of these issues I mentioned. Don't let this be you! Be healthy. Be active. Be comfortable in your own skin. Have some chocolate. And stop comparing yourself to everyone else out there. Find ways to not only feed your body but to feed your soul.
The Acupuncture Center of New Jersey - 40 Franklin Street, Morristown, NJ 07950To book an appointment with Rachel please call
Focus Time - Designing and Implementing an Awesome Now - Part 3
Multitasking be gone, or at least reduced significantly. Focus Time, concentrating on one thing for extended periods of time free of interruption or distraction, here we come! The last article in this series of "practices to prepare you for an enjoyable and productive now" was about sleep, and how necessary it is for brain growth. Sleep is not a waste of time! Are you ready for another myth buster? Multitasking does not make you more effective or efficient. Rather, focusing your attention in a continuous way for uninterrupted periods of time, or what Daniel Siegel calls "Focus Time" in his book Brainstorm, encourages the growth of the neural connections your brain makes when it has time to consistently absorb the information you are exposing yourself to. When you allow yourself Focus Time you stimulate brain growth. When you stimulate brain growth you are learning. As you allow your brain to learn you get smarter, not from the information you are exposing yourself to but from the different connections your brain makes in how to utilize that information in different situations under varying circumstances.
Everyone knows that a regime of consistent physical exercise leads to increased fitness of mind and body. The majority of people know the basic guidelines for eating healthy. Everyone knows that non-essential spending that leads to credit card debt is financially unhealthy. Knowing information yet being unable to integrate it into how you live your life isn't all that useful. You feel smart but live dumb. Training your brain to not only absorb information but connect it in ways that make it accessible to live out of is extremely useful. To sum it up, when you provide yourself regular opportunities to focus on one thing at a time for extended periods you optimize changes in your brain that are the basis for not only learning but integrating what you learn into how you live.
There is a tendency to attribute forgetfulness or the inability to retain information to aging. While changes as a result of aging do occur they can be easily confused with the impact of not fully concentrating on what you are doing. When you are not concentrating on new information when you study, where you put down your keys when you come home, what someone is explaining to you, etc. you are interrupting the very conditions that are necessary for turning what you are exposing yourself to into the synaptic changes in the brain that capture that experience into memory. Difficulty with memory may not be from aging at all but from constantly interrupting your brains ability to capture information by, regardless of what you were doing, randomly answering your cell phone, checking your email, the texts coming through, surfing the internet rather unintentionally, etc. The more you interrupt your focus the weaker your brain gets at being able to focus in an uninterrupted manner and retain what it needs to be effective. In a very real way you are scattering, rather than concentrating, your brain's ability to function.
This tendency for information to get scattered and therefore difficult to pull up can be reversed through giving yourself Focus Time. For those of us who are not currently studying in an organized program (college, graduate courses, professional education, etc.) some type of continued lifelong learning supports the brain to get and stay organized and grow again. Some examples of practices that support brain organization and growth are:
learning a new skill (to play a musical instrument, an additional language, etc.)
a book club
a course at your local community adult education center
a discussion group
reading uninterrupted
playing chess
making something out of wood, clay, stone, etc.
planning a garden
If we do not give ourselves Focus Time on a regular basis (consider a minimum of an hour a day) our brains stop doing what they were born to do, make new connections throughout life. With Focus Time you can not only prevent what we mistakenly think of as the inevitability of aging and "senior moments", you can also help your brain to become more flexible, adaptive, and capable! You can more easily live the information in your brain rather than simply knowing it. The more flexible, adaptive, and capable your thinking, the more you can actually retain, recall, and utilize the information you have been exposed to to creatively design and implement an awesome now.
Post written by Lisa Brick
Founder at Power & Purpose Coaching
Partner: Journey Beyond Divorce Coaching
Acupuncture for Winter Blues and Blahs
Ahhh … Winter. We have come to fear winter as if it’s a bitter enemy and we are helpless against its onslaught. Short days, long nights, head colds, flu, polar vortex and winter storm warnings, SAD (seasonal affected disorder), holiday and family stress, etc. etc. Unless you’re an avid skier or go to Florida until the spring it seems inevitable that winter will feel burdensome. There's a difference between winter feeling burdensome and actually being burdensome!
We do ourselves a disfavor to curse or ignore the natural onset and experience of the seasons and climate. In order to be well and live a life of full vitality it behooves us to discover a way to embrace and appreciate all four of our seasons. Yes it is cold. Yes it is snowy. Yes it can be downright impossible or dangerous to be out and about. Winter offers us opportunities to be homebodies, to slow down and reflect, plan, and dream.
Acupuncture and Traditional Chinese Medicine (TCM) therapies have unique and powerful insights and strategies so we can attune to and harmonize with this important and necessary time of year. Acupuncture treatments can strengthen the immune system, promote healthy rest and sleep (yes, you may need to sleep and rest more during the winter months), improve digestion, help control appetite and weight, and stimulate energy and libido (a great way to make a virtue out of the necessity of staying indoors). This is so because acupuncture, particularly with moxibustion and the use of warming and tonifying herbs such as ginseng, evodia, lycii, cinnamon and ginger invigorates the Qi, Blood and Yang to promote vitality, strength to our immune system, digestion, reproductive function and overall energy.
Eastern dietary recommendations, also an integral part of Acupuncture and TCM practice, strongly encourages the consumption of nourishing warming foods such as:
hot beverages, sauteed and roasted vegetables, stews, cooked grains and beans, and organic and humanely raised animal products
to strengthen and protect our core. It also recommends avoiding fried, processed and highly refined foods, chilled and iced drinks, raw salads and cold from the refrigerator fruits.
Ancient Eastern wisdom emphasizes the necessity for rest, quiet, and slowing down during the winter months. It speaks of how the element of Water (winter) creates the impetus for growth and creativity of Wood (spring). This is precisely what goes on biologically within our bodies and psychologically and emotionally within our spirit. Acupuncture is a very powerful tool to open and harmonize the energy flow in ways that make Winter much easier and more pleasant to experience.
Depression, anxiety, low energy and listlessness respond well to Acupuncture and TCM, supporting enjoyment of the winter months and the ability to take advantage of the beauty and peacefulness of this time of year.
In over thirty years of Acupuncture practice I have discovered that the most common causes of patient illness and depression in winter are not bacteria and viruses or snow or darkness but negative attitudes and anxieties. These attitudes are unconsciously shaped by the media and prevalent misunderstandings of winter as blatantly bad, dangerous, undesirable, inconvenient, etc. I recommend that my patients get outside for an hour every day, dressed to enjoy the winter sun, the freshness of the air, the briskness of the cold, and to marvel at the ice and snow.
Build a snowman, go sledding or ice skating, watch the snowfall and gather in drifts, or relax indoors with friends and loved ones in front of a roaring fire. Read, create, daydream! Take advantage of Acupuncture and TCM to embrace the beauty of our natural world at this unique and nurturing time of year!
Downtime - Improving Brain Function + Overall Well-Being - Part 2
Downtime is a necessity for optimal mental functioning during life in general and especially during the rough passages that inevitably arise. Downtime is short periods of time during the day set aside consciously, without goals or objectives. During downtime there is nothing to do or accomplish of any import whatsoever. The idea of giving ourselves time off from responsibilities and accomplishing goals may sound preposterous when there is so much to do yet this is exactly what the mind needs to unwind and to give the brain space to sort itself out. This is what downtime is, space to allow our brains to recharge their batteries and reorganize.
We forget that who each one of us is is a community of trillions of cells organized into systems within our bodies. These cells have individual needs for well-being. When we ignore those needs we diminish our potential and our ability to be as clear and effective as we can be when we attend to those needs. Downtime is one of those needs, one often unrecognized and neglected.
Downtime need not be extensive. Twenty minutes scattered throughout the day in small portions can be sufficient. Giving yourself conscious permission to:
turn away from the computer screen to gaze out the window for a minute,
take 10 after a meeting to walk around the block,
sit down to savor the warmth and flavor of a cup of tea without your phone or computer for 5,
stop whatever you are concentrating on, close your eyes and focus on your breath for a minute, or
excuse yourself from whatever to step outside and feel the elements (warmth of the sun, the wet of the rain, or the cold of the wind) on your skin for a few minutes.
The above activities are simple, achievable ways to give yourself downtime during the day. These sample activities, and any others you can think of where you have no goal or objective other than to be and see and feel what is physically around you, are downtime.
Downtime is not spacing out or daydreaming in the middle of a task. A wandering mind is disruptive to accomplishing goals and therefore disruptive to your life. If you are finding yourself spacing out in the middle of conversations or in the midst of a project your brain is telling you it needs more TLC. It is not getting the rest and relaxation necessary for it to function effectively. Among other requirements like sufficient sleep, nourishment, and drinking enough fluids, your brain needs downtime to organize efficiently. Your ability to think creatively, clearly, and effectively will be boosted by inviting your brain to relax for short periods of downtime every day.
Everyone, including you, has the capacity to set aside fifteen or twenty minutes during the day to tune out the hustle and bustle, the necessity to accomplish, the never ending trying to figure out why, when, and how and to let the mind unwind and the brain reintegrate on its own. By doing so you can reinvigorate yourself and return to your tasks renewed. Try it. You won't know the benefits you are missing out on unless you do.
Post written by Lisa Brick
Founder at Power & Purpose Coaching
Partner: Journey Beyond Divorce Coaching